Feel like I need to say something

Feel like I need to say something
Am not really sure what,
The words, they elude me,
My thoughts a sleepy swirl.

I stare at the screen,
It’s been a long day fighting the demons
I couldn’t really slay.
Your thoughts come back to my mind
When all I really want, is to lock them up
And never turn back.

Try to look ahead
Can’t even see beyond you
The heartbreak you left behind
The promise that was never you.

Were you a crush or were you much more?
A faint memory of what’s to be no more
A dream I dreamt without knowing why
Or were you a reality that only existed in my mind?

But you were my friend
Or was that also a myth?
So you left me
When I needed you the most.

Was it my mistake
Or was it an imagination all along?
A fantasy of a friend
Who wasn’t really one?

Try to make sense
Try to move on
But feel like asking you
Just one more time.

What went wrong?
What was it that changed?
Which made you go back
On every single thing you said?

All the times when you said you care,
And held my hand promising me you’d be there.
When you helped me dream weaving them for me
Did you ever really mean anything?

Have been meaning to ask you
For quite sometime now
Feel like I need to say something
Am not really sure why....